I guess sometimes life is about the little things. The moments when you help a friend or make a new one. The times you talk all night because the person on the other line can’t imagine being alone. Or when you give a friend a ride home so that they can finally crawl out of their shell and let out their demons.
These actions require both emotional stability and empathy. In these moments you need to prioritize another human over yourself. You need to walk into their shoes and feel around. Listen to what they say and touch what they feel. After some time you will hear and feel clearly through their perspective. You will be a part of them, and in many ways, you will be them.
It is then when you feel the pain they feel, you must also feel the happiness they feel. It is buried very deep within them, but nonetheless, it is there, just hiding. Their hope, their peace, and most all, their purpose, are all hiding in the back of their minds. Hiding from the light and being absorbed by the darkness.
When uncovering this light you cannot miss a beat or break a sweat. You cannot seem weakened or discouraged. You must present their happiness as an equal and allow this person to watch as you hold their happiness with confidence and hope. You would show this person the light that they believed was nonexistent and offer it to them. Eventually, they will hopefully follow your steps and gratefully take it from you. For those moments, and hopefully many more, this person will be able to hold onto the happiness that they thought they lost.
As you watch this individual have their moment of clarity, the hardest part follows. You must take off their shoes, prioritize yourself again and resume how you once were. Unchanged and stable. This process is difficult but not impossible. And when looking, as yourself, at the happiness your friend now holds, it makes it all worth it. Because at that moment you see more than they do. You see past this issue and look at the greater picture. You see hope. Hope that the world will grow. Hope that the world has a chance. Hope that you, yourself, can help heal it.
These moments can happen within minutes and give a lifelong memory. I have experienced this in many types of relationships. The one commonality I have found with these experiences is what it creates after. A bond is formed that is pure and true. One that I like to think of as simply a true friend.
I have seen so many people believe that they are the center of the universe and that they must prioritize themselves before anyone else. In a way they are not wrong, it’s your body, and who else is going to keep track of it if not you? Yet in such a globally connected world it would be nice if we were connected by more than just our cell phones and Snapchat streaks.
What I describe in the previous paragraphs is the ultimate connection. The connection between two individuals that for a split second, are closer to being one than two. As a human race I believe we should strive to have as many of these connections as possible. If we become connected, the world would be a much more understanding place. When one understands their neighbor, they are more likely to bring cookies, rather than complaints. When one understands their rival’s motives, they are more likely to find an agreement, rather than an argument. When one understands the pain billions suffer every day, the more likely they are to donate millions to those very people.
My intended takeaway from this post is to please make a connection. A real connection. One that involves you to not be you. One that makes you them, and if you do this enough you will eventually come to realize that they are the same as you, and always will be.
“We are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike.” – Maya Angelou